Okay, so here am again. To the point where I feel my life is totally screwed up. Like nothing is working. I am in neck-deep of crap and can’t do any thing about it.
It’s so ironic that in this world of incessant information, many of us are clueless as to what’s happening to us, most of the times!
Self-help has become a bad word. Cognitive science has become a misnomer for Gladwellization. There is no way for us to know if something is really true or just pseudoscience.
So when it’s just up to you and the world, when you find yourself down and out, and when you can’t understand the hope and joy out there in the world, what is that you can do?
#1 Take your ideas seriously
Why? Because it’s the only way you can go up. Ideas that occur to you — not ideas others are hooting around or hot trends everyone is running behind.
Look within, is there any idea that occurs to you, idea that you are curious to try? Do something about it. In the worst case, you will at least learn that it does not work.
#2 Stop thinking in terms of right and wrong
Black and White. Right and Wrong. Zeroes and Ones.
World is not binary. You can either think that you are wrong. Or that you took a wrong route, a longer route to your goal. Life is an incessant progress towards your yearnings, towards you “ideal” life.
In a binary world, you blame yourself when you are wrong. In a “progressive” world, you learn that you took a bad route and you correct yourself.
Experimenting and self-correction are the basic nature of human mind.
#3 Don’t doubt, take a position
It’s better to err than be in doubt.
In a study on infants, it has been found that we all come with a pre-disposed idea of the world. What makes human species different is that we learn, we validate and we correct ourselves.
It’s better to assume and start rather than waiting till you are 100% sure. All you need is just the appetite to learn and improve.
#4 Immerse in an idea for 30 days
When I had to exit my first startup, I had no clue. I had no idea what should I do.
I always wanted to write, something I was curious about. I wrote and I wrote. 14 hours a day. 7 days a week. For 30 days, I just wrote.
Hyper Focus can give you reprieve from all the beatings and self-blame. And it can give you a new skill at the end of it all.
#5 Question everything
Your memory, your ideas, your assumptions. Others’ memory, ideas, and assumptions.
Life is more fluid than we think. Our ideas are flimsier than they look to be. Our assumptions are weaker than we think.
Put everything out there. Out all the hidden concepts and beliefs and fears. Put the damn light in your attic.
And start chasing questions. Questions that could give you nuggets of truth. Questions that can give you insights to build on. Questions that will take you on a life journey of learning and improvisation.
No, I don’t know everything. I haven’t figured out it all. I am not a “know all” guy giving life lessons to people. I am learning just like you.
There was a wall I couldn’t cross. And I found a ladder. And I am pointing it to you, my dear friend. Use it and cross it. Let’s live our lives!
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Harish Ven is a Story Teller with amazingly positive hopes for the world. Captivated by human behavior, change, and the inter-lying areas. Dons the five hats — Writer, Researcher, Product Builder, Entrepreneur, Speaker. Voices his “5 cents” on entrepreneurship, research, internet products, consumer behavior, mental hurdles and more at BreaktheShackles. Collects stories from rural India and the world using pictures. Shares stories you don’t want to miss as tweets. Chases questions, Quora buddy.
